Posts Tagged ‘clients’

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My Political Year

Thursday, October 28th, 2010

If you’re in advertising, in any size market, you gotta be excited when November 3rd arrives. Political Ad Season is despised by just about everyone I’ve met…in and OUT of the business. The money spent is a testament to the size of the egos and amount of power to be had … no matter what level – even a small town. It makes me sick considering my local women’s shelter has just had to cut two more beds and turn away more women and their kids.

This is the first time in 28 + years we’ve been deluged by politicians. Media buying, copywriting, video shooting, audio taping, meeting, checks flying, e-mailing, phone calling, pre-empting (“You got bumped. Would you let us put you in Monday Night Wrestling?”)…it goes on. While none of the ones we worked with are bad people, I wouldn’t want them as regular clients.

The political marketing process on this level (and maybe others, though I doubt it) is “shoot from the hip, last minute decisions, a large amount of posturing, and waaay too many Indians.”  Ya know, guys, if it’s that important, then why didn’t you spend more time planning….it’s not like you didn’t know when it was going to be November 2nd.

We don’t formulate the “message”, we just make it look good.  We didn’t have anyone as titillating as Christine O’Donnell, (what an opportunity-this is my FAVORITE one) but we hope our guys win Tuesday. Then we can get back to work.

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Posted in advertising, From the chick's nest, marketing, small town clients | No Comments »

6 1/2 weeks

Thursday, August 26th, 2010

We want the billboards back. They were such a good morale booster for our salespeople.

After 6 1/2 weeks of primarily television (with two different offers), peppered with some radio and gratuitous small town (weekly) newspaper ads, the client wants his billboards back in the media mix. At our meeting today, we discussed this.

I was taught that the first person who talks after the question is asked loses. So I asked “Why?” and kept my big mouth shut.

“Our sales people are on commission and they’re used to seeing us on billboards. It helps us boost morale, and it shows we’re “out there” with our advertising.”

OK.  What else? (Morale booster? Really?  Buy ‘em lunch-it’d be cheaper.)

“Well, they haven’t seen our TV commercials.  Sales are flat and it’s such a big change for them to not see our billboards.”

How are sales now compared to a year ago?

“About the same.”

It’s been 6 1/2 weeks since we were asked to place your media. If we could make a significant shift in that amount of time, given your product, budget and competitive set, we’d have the Budweiser account and I wouldn’t be sitting here fucking with you. (I didn’t really say that.)

“Well, maybe we didn’t explain it very well to them up front, about our shift to more television and no more billboards.”

Welcome to the mentality of small towns clients who allow their staff input in areas that are not remotely in their field of expertise, who think that their target audience is “everyone”,  and who expect instantaneous results.

This is a small, regional cellular service. They can’t offer the iPhone. Their coverage area is spotty. They offer too many plans and have a history of changing their message with no consistency every 60 days. When their new Marketing Director was hired recently, she asked us to present a plan and their old agency to do the same. (The budget was reduced, and rightfully so. They were spending a fortune.)  The old agency refuses to participate (WHY?), we present, we win the work, and the Big Cheese who wasn’t at the initial presentation-and should have been-comes back 6  1/2 weeks later and wonders where the billboards are. Huh?

Who is your customer? Why you and not one of the big cell carriers? Let’s secret shop your retail outlets and see just how good your “experts-at-everything” sales people really are. Let’s get the research you’ve commissioned (Thank God) in here to give a peek at what the regional market really thinks of you, and THEN plan accordingly.

It’s like you gave me one shoe, asked me to run the race and wondered why I didn’t win.

This is a LOT more than billboards. It’s a tangled mess of dysfunction. It’s gonna be interesting.

And you wonder why mommy drinks.

Making a call in Hooterville.

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Posted in advertising, From the chick's nest | 5 Comments »

Being a good client

Wednesday, March 31st, 2010

About 5 months ago, a client wanted to renew our relationship. They suggested they had not been a “very good client” in the past and wanted to begin anew, that they would be better about providing us with what WE needed to do a good job for them. WOW. Since then, we have worked incredibly well with these people because they held up their end of the bargain.  Working for them hasn’t been a chore…it’s been a pleasure and the results prove it.

In a client/agency relationship, each has a set of responsibilities to make the process excellent and efficient.  Here’s what I ask for:

Be interested in what we’re doing. Engage us, ask questions, provide us with the information we ask for in a timely manner. I don’t want to feel like I care about your business image more than you do.

Return my call or email. I’m calling because I need an answer or information in order to HELP YOU.

Don’t dictate. If you knew how to do this, you wouldn’t hire us.

Pay us in a timely manner. And if you don’t pay your media bills, we are truly done.

Don’t try to run our business. Yes, I’m a woman, but after almost 28 years on my own, I can do this and it’s mine to screw up, then fix. Thank you.

Don’t drag your religion or politics into our relationship and I promise not to do the same.

Respect our process in developing the material. We are creative thinkers, and see things very differently than you do and go about getting to the end result in a manner that might be foreign to you. Actually, this is why you called us in the first place.

Trust our information. It is our business to know ratings and data, technical applications and trends. We wouldn’t lie to you.

Remember, we sell time and talent. Every nit-picky thing you change- revisions, re-edits – cost us time and in turn, you money. We want to get it as right as possible from the beginning. Help us do that.

Be the client we love!

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Posted in advertising, From the chick's nest, small town clients | 4 Comments »

How much for my words?

Tuesday, March 16th, 2010

I was making preparations for Italian Roast Beef, thinking about a very hard assignment we’ve been given. How will we ever give a Quality Assurance Program a look/feel/persona?  Then, it occurred to me. (Not the idea…I wish.) When do I NOT think about work? And how do I charge for THAT time?  I can see my Time and Expense report now: The idea came to me while chopping garlic for half an hour.

I have no answer for this. After almost 28 years on my own, you’d think I’d have a better sense of these things. I’m sure I leave money on the table. And God forbid, in a small town like Hooterville, they would think I’m screwing them. But, some vendors I have worked with charge for virtually every breath they take … and everybody knows it.  I am also a procurer of services, so I must be careful as I am responsible for the budget. I’m not smart enough to be a wheeler-dealer, and I really do give a damn about these clients, bone-headed as they sometimes are. I sell time and talent. My time, even when garlic chopping, must be worth something. Maybe it’s not how long it took…it’s that I can…and it worked.

Wonder how much I should charge for this one?

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Posted in From the chick's nest | No Comments »

Bad Client Part Three

Monday, March 15th, 2010

So then, the bad client (If you don’t know who this is, then you need to be a regular visitor of the Chick Nest. Read here. Then here.)  calls me and asks, “You’re still gonna do work for us, even though I was a shmuck, right, because we need some radio to go with that new TV”.

I would not make this up.

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Posted in advertising, small town clients | 2 Comments »

When Clients Go Bad

Thursday, March 4th, 2010

We developed a great strategy for a little family business and, over the years, have made them the one to beat.  We created a four-word tag line that is directive and memorable and, even though the owner stars in his own ads, everyone in Hooterville eats it up.

They hire us about once a year to develop a new 30 second TV commercial. I decided it was time to take the message to a different level. I showed him the idea, let him hear the music, and explained the how and why of the concept in great detail. His people heard it, too.  They approved. We proceeded.

And they hated it.

Turns out he had run his own little focus group, the majority of whom were TV salespeople, some friends and of course, his family.  “I seen your new add last nite, and man, it’s not you.  I know the Chick is good, but maybe she’s run out of ideas.” I kid you not.

There’s so much more to this silly little story, but the bottom line is:  He wants to come to a “settlement” on the bill and start all over.  He “loves” us and wants us to do the work. I’ve invited him to come to our studio tomorrow morning to discuss the situation.

Clients have the right to not like the creative we produce. But when it’s calculated, shown, explained, shot, edited, re-shot, revised, APPROVED, and the final is uploaded for station access, then pulled off the air because Bubba didn’t like the add, settlement is the last word that comes to mind.

Stay tuned.

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Posted in advertising, small town clients, video production | 4 Comments »

The Client/Vendor Relationship

Tuesday, February 16th, 2010

Chances are very good you have this relationship with at least some of your clients. And if you do, send them to your competition.

Thank you Kathie, the best female announcer ever, for the find.

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Posted in From the chick's nest | 1 Comment »

Today…

Friday, January 15th, 2010

…I watched a 60+ clients eyes glaze over as I showed him TweetDeck and explained Twitter.

…I was polite to a guy named Brad from India who called about Internet Advertising.

…I did not feel sorry for telling a deadbeat client that if he can do his own web updates, then by all means, please do.  But if he wants me to teach him how, there would be a charge.

…I did not toss the postage meter out the window when it said “inspection due”.

…I out-shocked the client who calls me and attempts to shock me with excessive swearing and vulgar, sexual overtones. I actually rather enjoyed it.

…I was patient with the client who, instead of reading what I sent to her BEFORE she called me, she read it to herself while I was on the phone with her.

…I realized I will NEVER be able to write down every thing that’s in my head.

…I counted the minutes until it’s time to load the car and go skiing for a week.

See ya’ January 25th!  I’M ON VACATION!!

Can’t ride the Harley in this weather!

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Posted in From the chick's nest, small business, small town clients | 1 Comment »

Designer versus Client

Thursday, December 3rd, 2009

The timing on this is perfect because I’ve been fighting this battle with the cretins…I mean clients…for the the last two weeks.  Like the new client (a very nice one, though) who brought me some logo ideas for his his new place, saying “you know, my wife has a good eye and is very creative.” ARRGHH!  I love it when he says “Are  you going to do it in Microsoft Word?” HA! A big thank you to Robb for sharing this…it’s spot on.

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Posted in From the chick's nest | 3 Comments »

They Said, I Thought

Wednesday, October 14th, 2009

It’s really a wonder we have any clients left. The guys I work with just shake their heads. The older I get, the more impatient I become with clients. When I decide to waitress, I hope I can keep my mouth shut.

Our in-house designer?  Oh, she can do that.

If she could, then you wouldn’t be here…give it up.

We don’t know who the customer is, we’re hoping you can tell us.

If you don’t know, then I KNOW I don’t.

My wife is really artistic…these are some of her logo ideas.

Then you should hire her.

We did these ads.

Your children are ugly, oops, I mean these ads suck.

And I really have said this:  ”With all due respect, what you are currently doing obviously isn’t working, or you wouldn’t be in my office.”

Welcome to small town advertising.

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Posted in advertising, small town advertising, small town clients | 8 Comments »

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